Posted by: David Giles | 13 May 2012

Me and my mattock

This is a mattock. As far as I can ascertain, it’s a big metal wallopy thing-on-a-stick that causes blisters.

I have been trying to master it over the last few weeks, as we begin to tame our garden. But I think we must have a wild mattock rather than a domesticated one.

There is presumably a knack to subduing it. There is presumably a way of ensuring that the adze bit of it makes contact with the same section of shrub on each wallop, so that you sever the branch/trunk/root rather than just create a series of impressions up and down it. (Mind you, I would consider it progress if I could hit the same shrub.)

Alas, there is no Mattocks for Dummies. There is no masterclass to attend. There is not even a Cubs mattock proficiency badge to strive towards. It’s just a battle of wills. And the mattock is currently winning.

So if you see me wielding a big metal wallopy thing-on-a-stick, it may be best to maintain a safe distance.

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  1. What does ‘adze’ mean? Which bit is said ‘adze bit’?

    • It’s the bit that is stuck into the ground in the photo. It is a blade capable of felling small trees, assuming you can brandish it consistently. Therein lies my problem… (OK, *one* of my problems!)

      • Thank you for the explanation. I can sleep soundly tonight, knowing this useful piece of information. :)

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