Having done justice to KL’s markets and metro system, we moseyed off to Singapore. Finding the right place to wait for the 08:25 train to the south was not a trivial matter, and we were told by two separate members of KTM staff to wait in what later transpired to be the wrong place. My stress levels were elevated when, just about two minutes before the scheduled departure, the right place to wait became apparent. Fortunately, this discovery was made in the nick of time, and we successfully descended into the underbelly of the station complex where our train was waiting.
Departure was just a couple of minutes late, and we settled back into our seats for the journey. It was not as scenic as the ride down from Butterworth, but it was interesting nevertheless. Less good was the air-conditioning which was, in technical parlance, clapped out. It finally lost the battle an hour or so before the border with Singapore, despite valiant attempts by the on-train staff to revive it. This meant that the inevitable hanging-around-waiting-for-immigration-officials-to-do-whatever-they-do was distinctly uncomfortable. Even the Malaysian passengers were decidedly hot around the collar, until one enterprising railway official found a carriage key to unlock the emergency windows.
We pulled into the platform at Woodlands, where we had to get off the train and push our luggage around the station – ostensibly for Singaporean customs to check for illicit materials, such as working aircon. The immigration officer who stamped our passports was pleasantly chirpy, and spotting my date of birth wished me a happy birthday. The railway staff on the platform were somewhat less friendly, and considered our attempts at taking a photo of the station sign to be little short of international terrorism. Shhh. Don’t tell anyone about this clear threat to national security.

As we reboarded the still hot-and-stuffy train for the final half hour into Keppel Road station, spirits were raised by a rumour that compensation was to be awarded. We had our tickets endorsed by the guard, who advised us to take them to the ticket office for some money back. The ticket office clerk, on the other hand, had different ideas when I huffed and puffed my way across the concourse. ‘You paid by credit card,’ he said wearily. ‘So cannot give cash.’ Eventually, it transpired that the princely sum of £1.50 would be credited back to my account. Woo hoo!
We found our way to the B&B, which was on the 25th floor of a tower block overlooking the railway. To be more accurate, it was on the 25th floor of a different tower block to the one we’d been given the address of. So, by the time we’d checked in and ventured out for the evening, we’d ascended/descended 100 storeys. Which felt like twice the distance between Earth and the Moon by this point.

It didn’t take us long to realise that Singapore is almost certainly the most expensive place to eat in the known universe. We trembled as we perused the pages of menus outside the nearby eateries. Fortunately, we happened upon The Jolly Frog, which suggested that they offered a ‘free barbecue’ on Friday nights. ‘Free’ is a word that we like Very Much Indeed, so in we went. It was the sort of place where a three-course meal requires a second mortgage, but undeterred, we ordered a couple of drinks. The free food was delivered, somewhat reluctantly it must be said, about 45 minutes later – presumably the idea is that freeloaders like us get fed up of waiting, and order more overpriced beverages in desperation. It didn’t take us long to chomp our way through a solitary sausage, some meagre shreds of bacon, a mini corn on the cob (each) and a small potato (to share). It also didn’t take us long to realise we’d need a different financial strategy to survive a whole weekend in Singapore without going into receivership.
Saturday dawned, and we determined to eat as much of the (inclusive) breakfast as possible, in order to ward off hunger pangs later in the day. It was a reasonable offering of scrambled eggs and a hash brown, served with toast, homemade jam and some fruit. We then made our way to the nearest MRT station, where we almost managed to buy a three-day Singapore Tourist Pass. ‘Almost’, because it wasn’t available at that station, but it was on sale two stations down the line. Once armed with the required travel card, we could be confident that at least we had our transport costs under control.
Our travels then took us to Singapore Zoo, where we whiled away several hours admiring otters, tigers, preboscis monkeys, orang utans, mouse deer and the like. In fact, there is nothing like a mouse deer. The zoo was the very model of Singapore efficiency – well laid out, and with plenty of opportunities to spend/lose a great deal of money. KFC ensured that we managed to eat without causing too much walletary damage, though their ’salad’ was about 0.001% of the size indicated by their publicity material. It required a second dose of otters before we were ready to face the real world again.


We returned to the metro, and caught a train around the northern loop line to Bukit Batok. In an amazing display of multi-modal transport planning that even the Scandinavians would be proud of, the shuttle bus to Ikea arrived at exactly the same time we did. And so to a small part of Sweden within Singapore. The primary reason for our visit was to avail ourselves of some low cost dinner, and we were pleased to discover that the trademark meatballs were very much in evidence. We were less pleased to discover that the staff member tasked with dispensing lingonberry jam was, in some way, related to Ebenezer Scrooge.
Sunday included a visit to South East Asia’s most highly regarded scrapbooking shop, which engrossed Mrs Giles for several hours. It was a timely visit, as it was the final day of a cut-price sale prior to the shop being refurbished. Phew. The effect of the sale was to reduce ‘extortionate’ to merely ‘expensive’, but several purchases were made. Lunch at a ‘buy one get one free’ venue was thwarted by the fact that the comprehension skills of the author had failed to notice that Sundays were excluded from said offer. Another hit to the bank balance – ouch.
The only activity left to your penniless correspondents was to take full advantage of the Singapore Tourist Passes. A thorough track-bash of (almost) every conceivable metro and LRT line ensued which, as even Mrs Giles conceded, was fascinating. Even the Punggol Loop, from which was seen an impressive array of kites. Hats off to Singapore’s urban planners, who have managed to shoehorn in an incredible amount of office and residential space, whilst still retaining green and unspoilt areas.
The final stop on Sunday was Chinatown, which was a seething mass of stall holders, bargain hunters and hawkers. We tucked in to some delicious street food for dinner – chicken satay with a very spicy peanut sauce. It was so good that we had to order a second portion.

Monday morning saw me joining the Singapore commuter rush, for a meeting with one of CCD’s major donors in the city. The office was so far up that I thought I would need oxygen, but fortunately altitude sickness did not set in. The meeting went very well, and the new edition of Spectrum magazine was favourably received. It was so useful to be able to meet the donor in person, to thank them for their generous support and to leave some candles made by the children as just a small thank you present.
Returning to the B&B by bus, I enjoyed the sights of the famous Raffles Hotel and the gleaming Singapore Museum building. Reunited with Sarah, we checked out and made our way by train to the airport, for our flight back to Bangkok.